2008

"Whatever it is, it's winning..."

"Shoot him in the head!"

"I am Iron Man."

"Hulk Smash..."

"GO Speed Racer, GO!"

"Why so serious?"

"A real RocknRolla wants the f*cking lot."

"The first thing you should know about us is... we have people everywhere."

"We have to kill Hitler."

(Cloverfield, Diary of the Dead, Iron Man, Hulk, Speed Racer, The Dark Knight, Rock-n-Rolla, Quantum of Solace, Valkyrie)

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Now playing: Joel McNeely - Prelude and Outer Space
via FoxyTunes

Max Payne, again...

Well, I tried to avoid it. I waited several weeks, but I just have to do a followup to my earlier post about the Max Payne movie.

In a nutshell; seeing this movie did not make me like the games any less.

But that's about the only good thing I have to say about it.

It seems to me that the writer was merely provided with a list of names (people as well as places) and told virtually nothing else.

The basic, broad (very, very broad) strokes of plot are there, but nothing else seems even remotely the same. It didn't even seem to be familiar. None of the set pieces seemed to survive the translation to screen.

The music wasn't even the same. I really liked the music from the games. I can't even remember the music from the film.

If you haven't seen this film yet: don't bother.

If you have: my condolences.

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Now playing: Bryan Adams - Empty Spaces
via FoxyTunes

Citizenship Quiz

This is cool.

I got 93%!

Mostly because I didn't pay enough attention to a couple of questions...

Warning: there's 96 questions on the full quiz!

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Now playing: Rammstein - Amerika
via FoxyTunes

Michael Crichton has died

Michael Crichton died of Cancer recently, he was 66.

I loved all the books by him that I read (I think I have read most of them) I liked many of the movies based on those books (sometimes the worst adaptations were the funnest to watch).

An avid believer in the concept of Chaos Theory (that small events have far reaching impacts and things fall apart) Crichton wrote some of the best stories of good intentions gone wrong, and made them all seem plausible (even the patently absurd ones) and scary (even the weird ones).

The best laid plans often go awry and Michael was there to point out the dangers of unconsidered advancement, putting on the brakes every now and again and asking ourselves to think about the consequences of our actions shouldn't be a bad thing.

Even when we try to better ourselves and the planet we should be careful and pay attention to the ramifications of our actions. Rushing headlong into the future can be exhilarating but so can careening off a cliff, at first.

I enjoyed his writing and much of his directing and I will miss his contributions to the world.

And don't worry; Nothing can go W0rNg%@.

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Now playing: The Animals - Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood
via FoxyTunes

The Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy

It just occurred to me while re-reading the opening of the novel 'The Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy' that in most respects the website 'Wikipedia' is the Guide brought to Earth...

Here is the original description of the Guide;

"Not only is it a wholly remarkable book, it is also a highly successful one — more popular than the Celestial Home Care Omnibus, better selling than Fifty More Things to do in Zero Gravity, and more controversial than Oolon Colluphid's trilogy of philosophical blockbusters Where God Went Wrong, Some More of God's Greatest Mistakes and Who is this God Person Anyway?

In many of the more relaxed civilizations on the Outer Eastern Rim of the Galaxy, the Hitch Hiker's Guide has already supplanted the great Encyclopedia Galactica as the standard repository of all knowledge and wisdom, for though it has many omissions and contains much that is apocryphal, or at least wildly inaccurate, it scores over the older, more pedestrian work in two important respects.

First, it is slightly cheaper; and secondly it has the words Don't Panic inscribed in large friendly letters on its cover."

Seems to be an apt description of Wikipedia itself and of its use in our lives.

I don't know why I never made that connection before.

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Now playing: The Beatles - Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da
via FoxyTunes

I Voted

And I hope you did too.

Even if there seems to be no one you wish to vote for, surely there is someone or something you wish to vote against!

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Now playing: Devo - Freedom of Choice
via FoxyTunes

Buyers Remorse

Buyers Remorse is that feeling that you may have made a mistake by purchasing that last useless widget that you simply 'had' to get when you were at the mall...

I hate this. PLEASE! if you bought an item and you realize that you may not truly need that thing or whatever, own your mistake. Deal with it, learn from it, and move on with your life. DO NOT RETURN IT! As a sales associate I can attest to the cold feeling in the pit of your stomach when you see a customer approaching your store with your logo on their bag.

"I'd like to return this item."
"What seems to be wrong with it?"
"I just don't like it..."
[AAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!] (this is me screaming inside my skull)
"... but, it's a radio. it tunes in radio stations, surely you knew this when you bought it..." [begins weeping inside]

I don't mean to say never return an item to a store. If the item does not work properly or isn't what you intended to buy; make that return! or better yet exchange it for what you do need. But I hate when someones reason for driving out to my store and bringing back a perfectly good device is that they didn't think their actions through or just can't be bothered to learn how the damn thing works.

And why does everyone think Sunday is a good day to return stuff?

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Now playing: Robert Johnson - Milkcow's Calf Blues [Alternate Take]
via FoxyTunes

Pain!

For a week now I have been in terrible pain. I have had back problems before, but this is truly a horror. What usually happens is that I sleep in an awkward position or spend too long playing video games/watching TV with my legs dangling over the edge of the bed, and my back gets compressed wrong or some such and all the muscles get tight and I get shooting pains down my right leg. Then after a couple of days of care and sleeping with my legs elevated everything is back to normal.

This time seems different. I have been going through Ben Gay and Ibuprofen like they're free, and it's more than a week now and I can just barely sit in a chair long enough to write this entry. Although I feel much better and the shooting pain is gone from my thigh, I still cannot sit very long without some pretty extreme pain when I try to stand.

At least I can function at work pretty well, I just have to be careful not to twist the wrong way or bend too far.

Your back is one to the worst things to loose the use of, right after your legs themselves and right before your teeth.

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Now playing: Ren & Stimpy - Log Song
via FoxyTunes

Ed

Ed is a friend whom I work with at, and met through, RadioShack.

I take pictures of many of my co-workers. Ed believes himself to be particularly unphotogenic. But he likes this picture...














I think this is a good picture as well...














And just to alleviate the homo-erotic vibe...



















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Now playing: Eurythmics - I Need a Man
via FoxyTunes


(whatever)

What did I teach you?

On August 10, 2008 Isaac Hayes died. He was 65.

Lets forget that he was a crackpot Scientologist who quit South Park because they made fun of his (non) religion.

Lets forget all the years of enjoyment he gave us as 'Chef' on that same show (Chocolate Salty Balls anyone?)

Lets forget all the great music he produced in the years before that. (Just talkin' bout Shaft!)

Lets remember him for what he taught us -


He was the Duke of New York; He was A number 1!!

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Now playing: Isaac Hayes - Theme from Shaft [Vocal Version]
via FoxyTunes

I like Mona Sax

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Now playing: Aretha Franklin - A Natural Woman
via FoxyTunes

Put Out My Flames With Gasoline...

As some may know the incredible video game Max Payne is being made into a movie. It comes out in October and I am very much looking forward to it. I was happy when I heard that Hitman was being made into a movie, but as you know if you've seen that one, the Hitman story is hard to film. Max Payne is a great story as well as a great video game, and therefore should make the transition much better.

Looking at the trailer, I am somewhat concerned to see the overt mystical elements played up so much. In the original game, and its sequel, these things are part of the story but are not overtly or objectively 'true' the story is very grounded in 'reality'. Granted it is a reality were the protagonist can use 'bullet time' and recover from being shot with simple pain killers. But there are no angels literally following him around either...

I have heard some express concern over Max being played by Marky Mark, but I think he is going to fit pretty well. I liked him in 'The Departed' and his face looks to be a pretty good match for Max from the game.

All in all I think I will enjoy this film and wait with much anticipation for October 17th.


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Now playing: Peter Hajba - Max Payne Theme
via FoxyTunes

Who Watches...

Your result for The Watchmen Personality Type Test

Nite-Owl


You scored 86% Moral Imperatives and 65% Attitude!

You are outwardly altruistic yet neurotically obsessed. Whether through a priveldged background or being just plain naieve, you try to act as a morally conscious individual while never fully attempting to understand the harsher sides of reality, torn between contemplating your own identity and being a good person. Though compassionate and honorable, you suffer from an incomplete personality and your unresolved neurosis border on the egomanical leaving you in the dark.

Take the test yourself!

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Now playing: Motorhead - Dance
via FoxyTunes

Triumph!

Triumph the Insult Comic Dog was at Comic Con. I don't know if I would let him give me a wedgie...

The keynote address given by the Insult Comic Dog.

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Now playing: Guns N' Roses - Sympathy For The Devil
via FoxyTunes

Get the H*LL out of my way!

I have long thought that people on the highway drive in a selfish manner. I'm sure I do some things that aren't all that nice, and even stupid. But at least I don't block traffic!

The left hand lanes are for passing! If you are not passing move to the right hand lanes! If someone moves up behind you change lanes toward the right. I hate when people are passing me on the right because some d*ckhead is poking along in the left lane. And if someone is trying to change lanes (and I mean using their signal) let them! Everyone will be better off for it.

Well, people, now there is hope. This article reports that State Troopers in Seattle have the right idea. Hopefully this will become a national trend.

There is also a problem of people passing, then pulling in front of me and slowing down. If you want to go slower than I am already going DON'T GET IN FRONT OF ME!

But one thing at a time.

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Now playing: Guns N' Roses - You're Crazy
via FoxyTunes

Some aren't all that bad...

Created By TheirToys Take the Test.


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Now playing: Motorhead - Ace Of Spades
via FoxyTunes

If it aint one thing it's another...

The last several weeks have been pretty hard on the machines around here.

First the air conditioner in the car went out, it was just blowing heat into the cabin. When we brought it into the dealer for repair it turned out it needed a lot more work done and the total bill was over two thousand dollars!

Then my X-Box 360 had a hardware failure, the dreaded 'red ring of death', luckily Microsoft has an extended warranty policy on this problem and fixed it for free. But I was still without it for several weeks.

Then my computer went on the fritz. In my ignorant attempts to fix it I made the problem worse and had to farm it out to my coworker Kevin to get it back in order. He was able to save most of my files and I am now, obviously, back online.

I hope that will be it for a while, I can't take much of this kind of excitement!

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Now playing: James Taylor Quartet - Mission Impossible
via FoxyTunes

Survivability

At least most domesticated animals couldn't kill me...

Well, would you?

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Now playing: Robert Shaw - Requiem Mass, for soloists, chorus & orchestra (Manzoni Requiem)
via FoxyTunes

Firehouse

Today, Ryan, our AT&T representative, took Weston, my new manager, out to lunch.

They went to 'Firehouse Subs'.

They brought my co-worker, Kevin, a sandwich.
(he sells a lot of phones)

They brought me a plastic hat.
(I sell many fewer phones...)



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Now playing: Buckcherry - Crushed
via FoxyTunes

Tax Season

I finally did my taxes last week. I usually do them very early in the tax season, but this year a strong sense of ennui took hold and I procrastinated until (nearly) the last minute.

I e-filed again this year, even though it costs money. I did it through H&R Block's online tax program and they charged me $19.95 each for my federal and state forms. I think this is way too much, but I just can't give up the convenience. If I let them deduct the fee from my refund amount the cost to me is somehow doubled... I successfully resisted that little bit of gouging.

Next year I may just mail my returns in, it takes longer but the price of a couple of stamps sure beats a $40 dollar price tag. I think I can wait the extra time to spend my tax refund.

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Now playing: The Beatles - Taxman
via FoxyTunes

Happy Easter

We're going all out decorating Easter Eggs...



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Now playing: Christoph von Dohnányi - Symphony No. 9 in D minor ('Choral') Op. 125: Adagio molto e cantabile
via FoxyTunes

Tech

Richard is a friend of mine.

I want that clearly understood right here up front.

But he recently sent me an e-mail of which the last line read
"Sent from my iPhone".

That's just terrible, he didn't even want an iPhone. I have no idea what possessed him to purchase one. But now he has one and I fear for our relationship. I've known he was something of a technophile for some time now. He has been going on about the Kindle for a while, but he bought an iPhone instead.

Don't get me wrong, the iPhone is pretty, and having the power of the internet in a mobile format is attractive. But damn, buddy! could you be more of a sell out?

An iPhone is so far out there I can't even bring myself to be properly jealous. I keep choking on the idea that you spent $400 on a phone... IT'S A FREAKING PHONE!!

You've already got a laptop, YouTube videos can wait for you to get out of the line at Walmart... You didn't need to go and get a f*cking iPhone.


Tool.

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Now playing: Pink Floyd - Another Brick In The Wall Part 2
via FoxyTunes

Cannibals?

How many cannibals could you feed?


Created by - OnePlusYou

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Now playing: The Mediæval Bæbes - Razreesh
via FoxyTunes

Oy!

There was an accident on Thursday night about 7:30pm or so...

No injuries, thank whoever, but there was some pretty serious damage to two of the four cars involved. And some less severe, but still somewhat serious damage to the third vehicle (mine). The fourth got away with a little dent and some paint exchange...

I was working at the time and the accident happened in the parking lot. The story, as it was related to me, was that a fifteen year old girl was trying to listen to the radio in a parked van and reaching to change the channel (or some such) inadvertently put the vehicle in gear and lurched forward in panic as she attempted to apply the brakes but instead hit the gas.

All I get out of it is that someone who should have known better was horsing around in a car and caused several thousand dollars worth of damage to three different cars.

The van ran into my co-worker Kevin's car and that car then slammed into mine, and mine was shoved into yet another. (see pics) The van and Kevin's vehicles were taken from the scene via wrecker. My car's wheel well was bent so that it scrapes the tire with only the slightest provocation, and the wheel itself is out of alignment. (I drove it home anyway, staying below 30mph and cringing every time I hit a dip in the road and heard the scraping of the car body against the tire.)

The girl responsible for the accident was an emotional wreck, Kevin was slightly less so (he has an excitable personality) I and the driver of the fourth car were basically calm throughout.

In the morning we speak to the insurance people!

Here are the pics(click for bigness):

Kevin's car will probably cost more to repair than replace.

You can see by the parking spaces how much the cars were moved around.

Doesn't look too bad until someone sits in the car and you get about a fingers width of clearance and realize the wheel wobbles now...

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Now playing: Holly Golightly - Walk a Mile
via FoxyTunes

More Album Covers that Never Existed

This one is by my friend Keith...



I think it came out well!

And here is my second attempt...




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Now playing: Garbage - Vow
via FoxyTunes

Two Ton Boa

I recently found several Two Ton Boa videos on the net. Including this one from the show I saw!

Two Ton Boa - White Rabbit

[via FoxyTunes / Two Ton Boa]

And here is their video for "Cash Machine"

Two Ton Boa - Cash Machine

[via FoxyTunes / Two Ton Boa]

And a live version of "Porcelain Throne"
(I really like this song)

Two Ton Boa - Porcelain Throne

[via FoxyTunes / Two Ton Boa]

Yes, I have become somewhat obsessed!


(just a little...)

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Now playing: Two Ton Boa - Porcelain Throne
via FoxyTunes

Happy Valentine's Day!

I'm not bitter.

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Now playing: Shakespear's Sister - Stay
via FoxyTunes

Albums That Never Existed...

This seems to be a fun game.

1 - Go to Wikipedia's random article page
The first article you get is the name of your band

2 - Go to the Random Quotations page
The last four words of the last quote is the album title

3 - Go to Flickr's Interesting photo page
Third picture, no matter what it is, is your album cover

Put it all together to make your album. Either crop it to CD cover size, or just use the raw image itself... the only rule is you're only allowed to add the album title and artist title.

I found this here, but it seems to have originated elsewhere...

My first Album:




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Now playing: Ozzy Osbourne - Shot in the Dark
via FoxyTunes

Blueophobia

I work at RadioShack, which you may say is bad enough... but wait! There's More!!

Beginning today blue is off the approved colors list. Previously employees of 'The Shack' could wear black, white, blue, or red shirts to work. Now for no reason whatsoever blue has been replaced on the list with (get this) the exciting and dynamic color: gray.

Why would anyone do this? Is gray a color that says; 'buy cellphones' did someone do a big marketing survey and find that blue was too threatening?

I just don't get it, I like blue, I have a lot of blue shirts. I have no gray shirts. (I bought some black shirts for this job) should I go and buy gray shirts? Or will they just change the rules on me again?

In 'protest' I wore only blue shirts for the past week and today I wore all black in mourning... just like Johnny Cash! I'm such a rebel.

I hate this job.

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Now playing: Johnny Cash - Hurt
via FoxyTunes

Concert Series

Speaking of other pursuits...

I went with my friend Keith to a concert at the NORVA on Sunday night. The headliner band was "The Dresden Dolls" who put on a great show very powerful duo, the Dolls. The guy on the drums is a frenetic wizard and the girl does keyboards and vocals. She's got a really powerful voice and can really belt out a song! They are a band you really have to be in a mood for though, as all the songs they played (except the covers of other bands) were real downers... Not that thats bad, it's just something you have to be in the mood for.

The opening band was "Two Ton Boa", I liked this band a lot! The singer, Sherry Fraser, 'has some pipes', as Keith puts it, there are a couple of tracks where she gets up to some serious vocal acrobatics (notably 'Porcelain Throne'), and it's all good.
As a personal note to other bands out there; a good cover of 'White Rabbit' is a sure way to get on my good side... The bands bass player is extremely energetic and puts on something of a show all on his own. A really fine performance all around.

During the encore both groups (assisted by some on-stage pantomime from audience members) combined to give a rendition of "Immigrant Song". It was truly something to see!


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Now playing: Two Ton Boa - Cyanide
via FoxyTunes

The Call...

...of Duty!

Ever been sucked into a video game?

It has happened to me, I have become obsessed with Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare. I play it every chance I get, I have begun resenting any activities witch curtail my access to playing this game. I play it for several hours after work until I am forced to go to sleep, then I wake up and play for an hour or so before work... It has become ridiculous!

So I've consciously decided to take a break from it. This break has afforded me some time to play a Role Playing Game with a friend of mine and even to go to a concert (which I usually never do). I still enjoy the game and will probably still play it a great deal, but I am making room for other pursuits in my life.

...like the internet (and blog entries).

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Now playing: Joe Walsh - Take a Look Around
via FoxyTunes